It is not uncommon to remarry after a divorce. All is not lost because your marriage did not work out. However, more can be involved in a subsequent marriage. You may need to take into consideration alimony, children and ex-spouses. Here are things you should know when considering remarriage after divorce.
What To Know About Remarriage After Divorce
When To Start Dating Again
After a divorce, you may need time to heal. Ending a marriage is not easy and can leave you emotionally and mentally bruised. Feelings of pain and bitterness can impact future relationships. You should first heal to ensure you do not bring baggage from your previous relationship into the new one. If you have children, you will likely want to have a parenting or visitation schedule in place before you start to date seriously. Once everything has reached an equilibrium between you and your ex-spouse, you can love again without resentments.
Talk To Your Lawyer
Remarriage is not restricted legally, but there may be a restriction on the timing. Your remarriage can also affect the terms of the divorce decree. For example, in Nebraska, you can’t remarry anyone anywhere in the world for six months following the entry of a Nebraska divorce decree. If you do, your marriage may likely be determined to be invalid. Other states have their own restrictions. Further, some divorces come with provisions that are affected by remarriage. For example, if you are receiving alimony, your alimony may be automatically terminated if you remarry.
It is important to talk with a lawyer to help you understand your situation according to the law. Other issues likely to affect your second marriage can be child support, custody, and inheritance. You should think these through and not ignore them because they could complicate your new marriage.
Consider The Children
A blended family is rewarding in many ways. However, in the beginning, there may be a transition period when you have children from a prior relationship. Further, children from a prior relationship will need to be taken into consideration when deciding how to plan for the family’s future. This can make the marriage more difficult at the beginning and for many years to come. Children can be affected by divorce just as much as their parents. They may also face challenges in finding out where they fit within the blended family. Some children fantasize that their biological parents will get back together, at least until one of their parents remarries. Think about your children before you get into another marriage. Chances are the children may need more time to deal with the after-effects of the divorce than you would for yourself.
You will also want to talk with the new spouse about long-term planning for the children of the prior relationship. Will they inherit the same as biological children you may have with your new spouse? Does your spouse understand that you will have to pay child support for the children or if you receive child support, how you plan to use the child support received? These are all issues you may want to talk through before marrying again.
Children who have grown up under their parents’ care might find it hard to accept someone new dating their mother or father. The bond between children and their biological parents can be one of the strongest bonds that exist. As a result, they might feel betrayed by their parent when their parent enters into a new relationship. In some families, the step-child/step-parent relationship can resemble the parent-child bond in many families. This isn’t always the case and isn’t a realistic expectation for many families. You can expect to have parenting disagreements and different opinions about your children. Talking these through prior to the marriage can help prevent the disagreements from becoming problems.
After remarrying, you may feel divided loyalties at times between your new spouse and your children. Even after stating your vows and making a covenant with the new spouse, you may still hold your children as your number one priority on many issues. It is best to discuss these issues with your spouse before remarrying in order to ensure a proper balance.
Work As A Team
The success of a blended family is not always easy to achieve. Before you remarry, you should both know your roles and identify your limits. There may be more pieces to fit together when you have children from a prior relationship. People find comfort when they know where they fit within the new family. When everyone is on the same page, you are on the path to success.
Remarriage after a divorce is common. It often leads to a fulfilling and lasting relationship for all parties involved. That being said, there are some added challenges to consider before remarrying. Think these through and talk things out before the marriage and you will be on the path to a successful remarriage.
Law Office of Julie Fowler, PC, LLO | Divorce Lawyers Omaha
Child Custody | Child Support | Divorce Lawyers Omaha
If you are looking for an attorney in a child support case or divorce in Omaha, Nebraska, or the surrounding areas (including Papillion, Bellevue, Gretna, Elkhorn, Lincoln, Nebraska City, Sarpy, Lancaster), contact our office to set up a consultation.